Numbers 4- Live and Not Die.

Numbers 4- The Work of the Levites- Live and not Die.
This chapter covers the work of the Levites (Kohathites, Gershonites and Merarites).
All people assigned to work were male from 30 to 50 years old.
The service of the Kohathites related to the tent of meeting concerned the most holy things.
The service of the Gershonites consisted on serving and bearing burdens: carrying the curtains of the tabernalce, and the tent of meeting with its covering, etc (see Numbers 4:25-28).
The service of the Merarites consisted on carrying the frames of the tabernacle and the pillars of the court with all of its accessories (4:29-33).

Something I found very interesting from this chapter was about the work of the Kohathites carrying the most holy things.
Aaron and his sons were to cover all the most holy things before the Kohathites carried them. They couldn't look into them or touch them or they'd die.
You can read the whole process in Numbers 4:5-15. Most of the things were to be covered with a blue or purple cloth and fine leather.
On verse 17 God tells Moses and Aaron the reason for so much covering and wrapping stuff so the Kohathites wouldn't come in contact with the most holy things and die.

"The Lord spoke to Moses and Aaron, saying, ¹⁸ “Let not the tribe of the clans of the Kohathites be destroyed from among the Levites, ¹⁹ but deal thus with them, that they may live and not die when they come near to the most holy things: Aaron and his sons shall go in and appoint them each to his task and to his burden, ²⁰ but they shall not go in to look on the holy things even for a moment, lest they die.' "

God is Holy. The things used for His service are holy because of His presence. Any contact with such holiness will bring death. He does not desire for anybody to die because of this. He desires us to live just as He desired for the Kohathites who served Him to live and not die. That's why He made provisions, that's why He warned Aaron and his sons to instruct the Kohathites so they wouldn't die.

 2 Corinthians 5:17-19

 "¹⁷ Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.^[b] The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. ¹⁸ All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; ¹⁹ that is, in Christ God was reconciling^[c] the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation."

 The thought of a God so great, so majestic and so gracious and loving overwhelms me. When I see His desire to be with me and I see myself, I am convicted of my unworthiness, I am humbled. I am left with no argument in front of such kindness.
All leaders, as Aaron and his sons, have this incredible responsibility to teach what the Lord has commanded us faithfully so that others may live and not die.
He has always and forever wanted us to live with Him. So, He made a provision. In the Old Testament through the whole ritual we read on Numbers (shadow of what was to come)- He is so Amazing, so Intelligent, so Beautiful!- and then He sends Jesus, to cover us, to reconcile us to Himself. I can see now everything pointing at Jesus.

No matter where you are, what you  have done or who you think you are. God desires to be with you and He has made a way for this. He is not unapproachable. He has provided Jesus because He wants us to live and not die.

Numbers 3- The Price of Redemption

The Sons of Aaron, the Levites, and the Redemption of the Firstborn
 - The Sons of Aaron were assigned by God as priests over Israel and the Levites were given to them as their assistants. The Levites work had to do with taking care of the setting up and cleaning of the Tabernacle.
The Levites were placed around the Tabernacle, between the Tabernacle and the rest of the tribes of Israel.

A couple of things that I have been thinking about from this chapter are:
1. The death of Nadab and Abihu, sons of Aaron, for offering unholy fire before the Lord.
What did they do that they died instantly?
 I did a little research on this and found a very interesting article about it: http://www.zianet.com/maxey/reflx63.htm

2. The Redemption of the Firstborn

Numbers 3:11-12 ^'And the Lord said to Moses, “Look, I have chosen the Levites from among the Israelites to serve as substitutes for all the firstborn sons of the people of Israel. The Levites belong to me, for all the firstborn males are mine. On the day I struck down all the firstborn sons of the Egyptians, I set apart for myself all the firstborn in Israel, both of people and of animals. They are mine; I am the Lord.”'
So, after counting all males 1 month up in Israel, there were 22,273 but there were only 22,000 Levites to substitute them.
The Lord sets the price of Redemption to be of 5 shekles or 20 pieces of silver, which were to be given to Aaron and his sons. That tradition is called Pidyon Ha'ben and is observed on the 31st day after a first born male is born who is redeemed by 5 pieces of 110 grams of silver (Five U.S. silver dollars are often used, though the specific type of coins depends on where you are in the world).

Why 5 Shekels? I don't know. Some people relate that to the price paid for Joseph when he was sold by his brothers. You know? They sold him without knowing that he would later save them all. Yep. another figure of Christ.

The Levites are a figure of Christ, too, who later would come to redeem His people. Who stands between us and God, to bring us into reconciliation with Him.

Even when there not enough Levites to redeem all firstborn, there was a price to be paid. Redemption is costly. It cost God the life of Christ, His own firstborn, to redeem us all.
For us, gentiles (and for all), there is no other than Christ who would be willing to take our place. To be the Mediator between us and God. Once and for all.
There's not enough enough money to buy our redemption. Only through Christ.
We are loved in such a way that God himself provided a way to bring us back to Him, to redeem us.
So much grace, so much love. 

1 Timothy 2:5-6

"For there is only one God and one Mediator who can reconcile God and humanity—the man Christ Jesus. He gave his life to purchase freedom for everyone. This is the message God gave to the world at just the right time."

Numbers 2- Axis

A couple of weeks ago, Penny mentioned something about Numbers I had been thinking all along, "It's a hard to read book".
Yes, it is. So many "numbers", so many lists...But why are they here? What is the purpose on reading all these names and details? WHY IS THIS HERE?
Let us continue to ponder on that in the upcoming weeks/months...

I was going to write a  rough  summary of all the things that jumped out of the page for me on the first chapters since I failed to blog as soon as I read them but last night I was thinking about it all and I am going back to reread them and find out more about these things that jump out for me.

Chapter 2.-
The Order of Encampment and Marching
God speaks to Moses about the order Israel should follow for encamping. Everybody encircling and facing the sacred tent. The Levites were positioned closely around the tent of meeting and the other tribes were arranged around them.
When they were to move, the strongest tribes went upfront and at the back. Yes, very strategic and so SPECIFIC.
As you read through Leviticus you will find all the commands are so specific, too.
These are God's instructions, He is taking care of his people, thinking ahead. He can see the future and needs to prepare his children for it... although sometimes we don't get it, right?
In these particular set of circumstances that I find myself in, why? Why am I facing East or West? Why are we going this way? Why am I sitting here? Why are things going like they are? why, why, why?
I am real big on the WHY word and don't always get an answer. But we live by faith therefore I must believe that God cares about every detail of our lives. And, that He knows best. He knows the future, He holds it in His hand.
If we listen to Him on every detail of our lives and follow His instructions we will be ready for whatever life may bring.

Notice this: the way he sets it all is with His very Presence at the CENTER of IT ALL.
When they camp, the Tabernacle is at the center. When they move, the Tabernacle is at the center.
He is the axis, He holds it all together.
Is the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit at the center of our lives?

Numbers

Yesterday I realized that I had come to the end of Leviticus. My Bible reading plan, usually, comprises reading daily a chapter from an Old Testament Book, a Psalm or Proverb and a chapter from the New Testament. Sometimes, I start in order, sometimes I just pick randomly.
Anyway, this time I started in order. It just occurred to me to share my findings. It seems that every time I read a book I discover something different.
I will share later my take on Leviticus.

Here are my reflections on the Book of Numbers.

Currently, I am reading The Wesley Study Bible (NRSV).

Introduction to Numbers and Chapter 1
As I started reading it I was reminded that Numbers means "Census".
- Here is part of the Introduction to Numbers that called me to meditate:
"The title of this fourth book of the Pentateuch comes from counting two generations of Israel's males who were 'able to go to war' (chs.1,26). The first census counts men, twenty years old and above, who had experienced Egyptian slavery and deliverance, but who rebelled. The second census enrolls the next generation, which eventually enters Canaan under Joshua and receives land allotments.
The book could also be called 'rebellions,' for Israel repeatedly breaks covenant, loses faith, and even seeks to return to Egypt. Although they question Moses' authority at every turn, we witness here his solidarity with the Israelites and his status as the ideal prophet and closest friend of the Lord..."

* The second paragraph made me think about my faith journey, our faith journey as a family and as the church. How many times have I broken my covenant with God to love Him and worship Him only? How many times have I lost my faith and sought to return to a life of slavery?
This is the story of us. We are that way. When we encounter ourselves in the middle of the desert we tend to forget He who brought us out of Egypt will lead us to the promised land.
And yet, God is faithful.
I sure can identify with the story of Israel.

- The First Census of Israel in Chapter 1 takes place 13 months after they have left Egypt, they have not made it to the promise land yet, they are in the middle of the desert.
The descendants of the sons of Israel, their lineage, in their clans, by their ancestral houses, according to the number of names, individually, every male from twenty years old and upward, everyone able to go to war:

•  Reuben- 46,500
• Simeon- 59,300
•  Gad- 45,650
•  Judah- 24,600
• Issachar- 54, 400
• Zebulun- 57, 400
• Joseph:
• Ephraim- 40,500
• Manasseh- 32,200

• Benjamin- 35,400
• Dan, 62,700
• Asher- 41,500
• Naphtali, 53,400 

Over 553,550 men , not counting the descendants of Levi!

* Let us go back to Genesis and of Abraham for a minute...The episode where Abraham and Sara laughed at God's promise of giving them a child in their old age (Genesis 17:17, 18:12-15)
As I take into account those numbers, I think of Abraham and Sarah cracking up. And I laugh, too. They had no kids, they were old, they were giving up hope but GOD promised to make his descendants numerous. God gave them a child and look how many their descendants are now!
God managed to get them ALL out of Egypt and now is leading them through the desert to the promised land.
How amazing is this? God has been doing what He said He was going to do.

I wanna laugh and say "Look, Abraham and Sarah!! The Lord is faithful to his promises. Thank you for believing!"
What an incredible cloud of witnesses to this we have.

Is Anything too Wonderful for the Lord?

The Lord said to Abraham, ‘Why did Sarah laugh, and say, “Shall I indeed bear a child, now that I am old?” Is anything too wonderful for the Lord? At the set time I will return to you, in due season, and Sarah shall have a son.’ But Sarah denied, saying, ‘I did not laugh’; for she was afraid. He said, ‘Oh yes, you did laugh.’ Genesis 18:13-15

So much has happened during the last year. We went back to Peru last May, we had another baby, Gabriella Anise. It seems like we have been sooo busy.

Sometimes I feel like my routine is going to swallow me (including the laundry pile.)

Last October I had the opportunity to lead "The Workbook of Living Prayer" by Maxie Dunnam. We had an awesome group of people to read, pray and meditate with.

One of the many things that has stayed with me is the "bold requests" that we can have a hard time asking God for. We got to share them all. Things that may seem diminute or too big or just plain impossible. I had a couple.

- One of them was healing. Healing for somebody that is now part of my family. I told God I will not take "No" for an answer. We need it, she needs it. We need this miracle and will insist on it. Like the widow.

- Another request is about my weight. I need to loose 70 pounds. I have never been that light but I need to. I want to. But I need the strength and motivation to do so.

I started on Weight Watchers online about 13 weeks ago and have lost about 18 pounds. It feels good to get rid of some weight and fit into some of my clothes again. I had gained a lot of weight with my last pregnancy.

I have discovered many things about myself. I am an emotional eater. When I am sad, I eat. When I am happy, I wanna eat. You know. To celebrate or to comfort myself.
A couple days ago, I read a tweet from Rick Warren "When something eats us, we overeat.Gluttony is self-medication for unhappy emotions."

I do overeat. When something is really good, I have to have a lot of it.

When I am sad or stressed, I have found myself reaching for chocolate, ice cream, anything sweet.

So, I have been self-medicating myself. This external problem has deep internal roots. Lack of trust and reliance in the Lord. Not letting Him have my burdens.

I have been struggling this last couple weeks with Thanksgiving pies and Christmas candy. BTW, I have realized I like sweets a lot. According to Weight Watchers, the point is not to deprive yourself but to take reasonable, healthy measures of what you like. Change your habits.

So, I have found myself indulging and feeling guilty about it afterwards.

I have just lost 1 pound during the last two weeks. I failed to count my points many days. On purpose.

Today, I have to start again. Mondays is weight tracking day for me. And I feel disappointed that I wasn't more mindful and gave in really quick.

But, here we go, we start again. I guess the discovery is worth it. I have to cheer me up somehow. I have to remember my goal.

Before I went back to work I was exercising regularly. Zumba, weights, core, running, etc. It has been 14 months since I did that.

I feel like I am juggling everything trying to fit in all I need to do. My family, their activities, my work and now trying to incorporate myself is crazy.

This weight loss challenge has turned out to be deeper than that. Changing my habits, not just my eating habits, but my thinking habits, my trusting habits, my spiritual habits.

I am a hard one to deal with. When I think about my "bold request" I laugh like Sara did. I laugh because I think deep inside, I may not have the strenght in me, because I know my limitations. I know I am not a very disciplined person. I have never done it before. I like sweets too much. And, so much of it is about discipline.

At the same time I pray for all these things, for a change, for a dream that is more than a superficial desire.

And, when I do, I remember "Is anything too wonderful for the Lord"....

Is it?

Is anything too wonderful for the Lord?

The Freedom of Surrender

I am in the middle of making very important decisions. I go to sleep thinking about it, go throughout the day thinking about it, wake up thinking about it. All the time I am thinking about it.

The more I think, the more I see things I do not like.I have to be a masoquist to take this path, is what my mind says. Then, I realize how my character needs to change so much. I am aware of all my shortcomings and I feel so unfit, so lowly.

As I was driving this morning I kept thinking about it and my heart kept getting heavier and heavier.

Finally, one thought brought it all to peace. "If you would just surrender everything to God, you would be free."

Yes, it may sound like a paradox. But, giving Him your fears, dislikes, character, goals, dreams...EVERYTHING, will give you freedom, will give you peace.

It's laying down everything at His feet. I am not carrying those things anymore. I am free, I am weightless now.

There is freedom in surrender.

Ah.

Manana es Cinco de Agosto....que mas puedo decir? Alrededor de este tiempo mi angelito habria nacido.
Alrederdor de este tiempo nuestras amistades estan y estaran dando a luz.
Por primera vez despues del D & C, fui al hospital a el area de maternidad a visitar a unos amigos que acaban de tener su bebe. Al llegar a la playa de estacionamiento trataba de no pensar en lo que sucedio hace cuatro meses porque se que las lagrimas empezarian a brotar y no podria parar. No queria que mis amigos se sientan raros al expresar su gozo.
Al llegar al cuarto tuve que esperar afuera unos minutos porque estaban ocupados. Al levantar la mirada, habian pequenos cartelitos en las puertas de los otros cuartos con los nombres de los bebes recien nacidos, con adornos y colores de bienvenida....empeze a preguntarme que hubiera dicho el mio?
Empece a recordar ese momento de expectacion, de alegria que se tiene cuando tu bebe llega al mundo. Esa expectacion que tenia al esperar su llegada y el vacio en nuestros brazos...
Me pregunto una y otra vez si alguna vez me olvidare de lo que paso? Si alguna vez ya no dolera tanto? Si alguna vez ya no lo extranare? Si alguna vez mirare atras y entendere?
Algunos dicen que ya no me sentire tan triste pero es algo que no se olvida...
Hay una tristeza y dulzura al recordarle...

Estuve leyendo Eclesiastes. Uno de los capitulos finales decia que todo lo que sucede bajo el sol es absurdo, realmente nadie lo puede entender.
No se si busco entendimiento.
Me pregunto como es que la gente trata con la muerte de sus seres queridos, con la perdida de sus hijos, de sus bebes, de sus bebes aun no nacidos.
Leia en internet que algunas madres se enfocan en tratar de tener otro bebe....no creo que lo hagan con el deseo de hacer un reemplazo.
Siento que un reemplazo no es la solucion. Al menos no para mi.

Entonces que queda? Aceptar. Seguir adelante. Someterme a la voluntad de Dios confiando en Su sabiduria, sin cuestion, ni queja.